Mediation vs. Litigation

Mediation, to be successful, requires that the parties come to an agreement on at least some of the issues.

Of course, the fault lines in the relationship are likely to become apparent through mediation. The relationship has already been fractured, but sometimes the smaller fault lines are not obvious - until you get both people in a room trying to work out every intimate financial/emotional detail.

We are often far more emotionally tied to various financial issues than we think - or at least to what those financial issues represent for us. If it was as easy as having one person divide the cake and allowing the other to choose - you wouldn't need mediation.

There is what California law might call for (depending on how disputed facts are resolved by the court), there is what each party acting alone might think is equitable under the circumstances, and there is what BOTH parties can agree is equitable. Mediation tries to get you to the third step, and it may have little or nothing to do with the first two options.

This is why those involved in mediation must commit to the process of mediation itself, and also why mediation is a lot more work than one might first suspect - and also why those who successfully make mediation agreements are usually more satisfied than those who force the court to make all of the decisions.

1 comment:

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